Clowns, uncles, singing Chuck E. Cheese robots and 80’s cartoons used to make us fear opening our eyes when we were kids. It made us transform our Optimus Prime tighty whities into BumbleBee undies overnight. Relive these great moments in the special nightmare fuel stall. It’s a little light right now, but the reunion party is just starting. Hmm, this might be an ample time bring out my Sesame Street blanket. I think Big Bird is starting to fade out just a little…
Stall Buddies?
I bet most of you rarely, If ever, use “numero dos” in a public bathroom. Going into a stall and praying you won’t see something nasty in the pot is one of the most chilling experiences one person can have. I remember one time a business man in the stall next door to me asked “Excuse me, do you know what time it is?”. Umm, time for me to drop a nasty deuce? What the hell are we, freaking neighbors now? A restroom is like a mock funeral, you don’t say anything, touch anything, and your ultimate goal is to get out of there as fast as humanly possible.
That being said, Flushableitems isn’t your typical site. It’s a war-zone of nonsense, and your going to need a few platoon mates to assist you in combat. So we’ve hired a culturally diverse panel of commentators (bathroom buddies) to pour a little wisdom into your soul while you read.
Gumbee Gold: Straight from the grill of an unknown rapper, Gumbee Gold brings us urban flavor, street smarts and an exploitive stereotype. Can you blame us?
Knock Knock.. And apparently no one is there. We told him what a “urinal cake” was and why you can’t eat them. He put a birthday candle on one. Nuff said.
Professor Sticky Bottom: Every website needs an on-call professor, especially one that deals with mass of unexplainable things we discover daily. We don’t know what type of professor he is, but who are we to question a man that wears reading glasses on their ass? That takes a lot of skill.
There are more characters to annoy you throughout, and depending on what the subject matter of the stall is, some will appear more frequent then others.
If you didn’t already see us in action via Nightmare fuel above, you can checkout another example here. Poor guy, thats gotta hurt!
